September 21st, 2005

KH - neurotic - paper

GRACIE HAS THE HOTS FOR MEEEEE

She even went as far as to convince me to get tipsy by drinking wine with her last night. And, seriously, I cannot hold my wine. Hard liquor, fine, I can drink that all day. One glass of wine and woooo watch out.

Things I did last night that I blame Gracie for:
  • Along with Otis, being convinced to skip class and play on that CRAPPY TITAN SITE for a tournament

  • Getting beaten by a "journalist" in chess (and I was ONE MOVE away from checkmate, dammit)

  • Managing to pull down the Euchre Master's play enough to get whooped 3 times in a row, by a PLO8 player and a "webmaster" and then again by G-ROB. Oh, the HUMANITY!

  • Hitting on Otis' chip stack while railbirding the tourney

  • Heck, I blame her for my tipsy railbirding in general

  • Professing my TOTALLY PLATONIC love for DoubleAs, Otis, BG, GRob, and probably a couple more folks I don't remember ...

  • Retracting the above statement after getting SCHOOLED by Otis and Grob. I can't believe I'm admitting I got schooled by G-Rob (and on top of that, more than once). I may forgive them if they go to Vegas, though.

  • Lemuring off $25 to Iggy with middle pair in the NLHE blogger game (does $10 of that count as paying off my bet?)


However, I don't blame her for putting my money on Otis to make the top 5 in the WPBT event, because I would absolutely do that sober. Too bad he didn't win, or I'd be heading to the boathouse this weekend. :D

Thank goodness I'm one of the people who are genetically blessed with not getting hangovers, or I'd be a mess today.
KH - no crush

Why I platonically LOVE BIG SEXXY

It's because he entertains me with gems like these:
Also, he blushes really easily.


The Mensa Invitational once again asked members to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.


Here are this year's {2005} winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating.
4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: All talk and no action.
14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.